Remembering... Waiting...

This is an installation sculpture in rememberance of the Holocaust by George Segal in front of The Legion of Honor in San Francisco.

When I first developed this roll and saw this picture I wasn't quite sure why I took it. I even took a group of them and put it in my pile of trash pictures that absolutely didn't turn out (but I never actually throw away).

But as I was looking through my pictures again for this blog I gave this one a second look.

It's definitely a different feel. It's undeniably creepy.

But there's something about it that, I feel (if I'm gonna toot my own horn), that captures the feelings of the art itself. Something silent, expectant, broken, yet somehow still waiting.

Club for Film Photographers

I feel like film photographers should have some sort of club. And when you're officially allowed to join it's like a school graduation.

"Yay! I can do it! I have something in common with these awesome photographers!"

I feel like it should imply special discounts, extra recognition, and instant friendship.

I guess that's as ridiculous as expecting to be accepted and liked by someone else because you're the same race.

Either way, I feel like I'm breaking into some sort of secret club. And I can't wait until I start feeling the perks, meeting the other members, and fully coming into my own as an honorary member.

I also feel like I need a new camera.

My bank doesn't support this cause. Neither do the other things needed that have been on the back burner. It also isn't an emergency even if I do feel like if I don't get something new I could die.

If there's anything I've learned it's that no matter the camera, it won't make your pictures any better. Too bad, because if I could buy a magical, awesome, do it all camera, I might. I might get one and then quickly discard it because I've grown to appreciate all my mistakes along the way. They're happy accidents. Maybe my start in toy photography taught me the skill (possibly seen as a flaw) of loving and accepting something that isn't perfect.

In my class I've noticed that everyone else constantly has the goal of perfection. They're angry at strange shadows, light leaks, a little bit of blur, the tiniest shade anomaly. Maybe that should be my goal because they're all much better than I am but I can't help but attach a little bit of love to the first messy couple of prints or test strips I make of a picture.

I'm still formulating ideas for what's supposed to be my first artistic photography series so I'll catch you up when I get there.

If anyone is in the San Francisco/Bay Area area and wants to volunteer as models, let me know!

It may take a little longer but I know I will find my way back...

Tonight I start my next level of Black & White classes.

Ano Nuevo

Here's a double entry since I slacked off yesterday.

These are from two trips I took to Ano Neuvo a couple of years ago.

If you see any strange lumps in any of these three pictures they're sleeping elephant seals!

When we went the pups (or wieners) were just lounging, playing, and passing the days before being able to leave the beach as young adults.

If anyone is considering going I'd recommend it. It's a nice short walk and what's more exciting than seeing Californian native wildlife?

(I'm still loving the color of the sky from this film)

Close, Closer

Sands of Time

Blue

The blues of this particular roll of pictures came out absolutely amazing.

I can't remember exactly what kind of film it was because I bought a varied bunch from ebay a little while ago. They were expired, I remember that.

The magic of that blue is just one more reason why color photography will always be where my heart is.

Even if I am taking a second level Black & White class. 

SummerLess

I wish I could escape.

I kind of wish I had more vignetting on my pictures. They make me feel as if they're mysterious. 

Impending Doom

This has proven to be the longest week in a series of long weeks in a row of long months, joined together for a couple of the longest years in my short life. I hope these are the longest years or sorrow and grief I'll ever have to endure.

My Favorite Four-Eyes

I figured I'd hit a couple of birds with one stone:

• Post pictures on my blog
• Participate in a relatively popular trend right now of portraits against textured backgrounds
• Display my penchant for Adam and the bottom left hand side of my pictures. I don't know why. It just appeals to my aesthetic, ok?
• And, make Adam hilariously mad at me for putting pictures of him all over my blog. Only jokingly mad of course... right?

 

This one's actually digital with a couple of filters... I know, cheating, right?

Mid-Week Escape

I always feel my energy and emotional stamina flagging in the middle of the week. Work is wearing on me, my hope is wearing thin.

I could use a pick-me-up right about now.

All Aflash and Aglow and Full of Wonder -- Spinning

(Diana, Barcelona, Spain)

This morning, on a complete high from last night's film processing excitement, all I could think about was film, film, film. I felt like I was... happy. Strange, I know. I felt like throwing a parade. And everyone who knows me knows that there is little more that I love more than a parade.

Work brought crashing back down to earth just a little though.

But I refuse to let it bring me down too much.

Future photography plans:

• Take as many photographs today and tomorrow as possible.
• Get some practice processing Wednesday or Thursday
• Take even more pictures over the weekend! (Camping!)
• Try to fit in processing them on Monday before class.
• Finish my B&W I class

I'm currently debating whether I should take B&W II next, and further develop (ha ha, develop) this skill set before I move on, or if I should take Color I, where I know I'll ultimately head.

I am absolutely enthralled. Which is new for me. New, different, and such a good thing. A breath of fresh air.

The Opposite of Drowning

Happy Saturday

Zoo Aquarium De Madrid

Diana

Happy Friday

My first look at the Mediterranean Ocean.

As a girl whose lived beside the Pacific Ocean her whole life, being witness to another body of water is always, somehow, significant to me.

And with that, with sighs full of thoughts of daytrips, adventure, warm mediterranean beaches, cool night jazz bars, and escaping the grueling work week, I wish you all a Happy Friday.

El Parque Del Buen Retiro

I'm posting so many to make up for not posting yesterday.

I'm gonna have to start taking a lot more pictures soon to keep up with this thing.

And, I plan on getting a better, more awesome scanner eventually...

City Night Lights

The Clamores Jazz Bar.

By far, the coolest fucking thing I've ever done in a very serious sort of way.

(Diana print 4x5)

Vacation Blues

When we went to Spain we made a day trip to Segovia. This is the cathedral that we took about 9 million pictures of. Day trips somehow add a feeling of breathlessness, excitement, and freedom to pretty much anything.

This picture was a mixture of those feelings and the grand scale (and sometimes overbearingness) of the buildings that surrounded us. The humbling expanse of the detail and history and the rich culture around us.

(Taken with my Diana and then printed 4x5)

Introductions

Oh, and in case you were wondering, this is me!

(as taken by Adam on my Diana)

Introductions

My Playground

Introductions

My Home

The Beginning

Highway 1, between Half Moon Bay and Santa Cruz. Taken with my Diana.